By now, everyone in the world has been alerted to the foul smell that lay over Manhattan
on Monday. Naturally, to the news media this mysterious pong clearly reeked of terrorist threats and dirty bombs
, and for a few hours we were treated to the usual edifying speculation and half-cocked theories about what it might be.
To most New Yorkers of my acquaintance, however, the nostril-tickling aroma wasn't such a big deal, given that on any given day in the city, the mucus membranes are assaulted by the scent of urine, rotting garbage, body odor, vehicle fumes, and various other olfactory delights. If anything stinks to New Yorkers it is, currently, the Jets and the Giants
, and the brawling Knicks
In the end, however, a conclusion for the source of this reverse Perfume
was reached that was as satisfactory and time-honored as the assumption that New York stinks: It was all New Jersey's fault
. Now, that smells like the truth to me.